Craig’s Friday Countdown - Peak Crayon

As we all try to figure out exactly what year we are going back to as America becomes great again, maybe it will be easier to start with something tangible, like the best year for Crayola crayons.

#10) tie  1903 – 8 colors in a box.  Not quite enough colors. 

#10) tie  1998 – 120 colors in a box.  Too damn many colors.

#9)  1993 – 16 colors get added, including “Asparagus”, bringing the total to 96 colors.  96 colors is a stupid number, and “Asparagus” is the gateway crayon to “Cauliflower”.  Like any right-minded human, I loathe cauliflower.    

#8)  1999 – “Indian Red” is renamed “Chestnut” in a fit of political correctness.  The “Indian” in “Indian Red” came from the place “India”, not from the Cleveland Indians, which is truly offensive.  So, as always … Go Cubs.    

#7)  2003 – “Inch worm” is added.  What the heck is “Inch Worm”?  And why is it green?

#6)  1949 – 40 colors added from the original 8.  Now, we’re getting somewhere.

#5)  2000 – “Torch Red becomes “Scarlett” and “Thistle” was replaced by “Indigo”.  This is, technically, a draw.   

#4)  1958 – 16 colors added from 1949, including “Plum”.

#3)  1962 – “Flesh” becomes “Peach”, beating Congress to the Civil Rights Act by two years.

#2)  1972 – 8 fluorescent colors were added, bringing the number to 72. 

#1)  1990 - The 8 fluorescent colors added in 1972 get awesome names including “Hot Magenta”, “Wild Watermelon” and “Atomic Tangerine”.

Still no idea what year the Make America Great Again wayback machine is being set to, but 1990 is peak crayon.