Craig’s Friday Countdown Run Over

Things I’ve Been Run Over By [Chronologic Order]

[1962 - ?] Fate:  Northside Chicago birth dooms me to be a Cubs fan.  But did you see Wednesday night?  Maddon has Sczur run for Rizzo.  It’s like we have a real manager now!  But I digress …

[1962-1979] Four Older Brothers.

[1969] VW Bug:  More sideswiped than run over, yellow Beetle wins Sir Issac Newton contest with bicycle.  Wheelchair awaits.

[1972] Dad’s Tuberculosis:  Mooseheart awaits.

[1975] Honda ATC 90: Before they were banned by the feds, John Helgren’s right rear tire eats me alive.

[1976] Kickoff Special Teams:  Returning kicks is excellent preparation for the profession. Who’s fast, overly optimistic and expendable?  Malin.

[1976] Honda Odyssey:  If you ain’t rubbin, you ain’t racing.  Brother Greg takes stock car maxim to heart, knocks me off dirt bike and runs me over to win.

[1977] Mom’s Cancer:  Do they still announce over the high school loudspeaker that a student’s parent has passed away?  Well intended I suppose, but not right.

[1979] 1968 Firebird:  “Skitching” down a snow-covered road while hanging onto Rick Dishman’s driver’s side door handle was fun.  Until it wasn’t.

[1980] The Man:  High school rules were bogus.  I didn’t abide.  Class graduates without me.

[1987 - Death Do Us Part] Love.

[1999 – 2038] “Buses”:  Local government CAO duties include periodic views of the undercarriage of public policy.

[2012] Insides:  One undercooked brat at a ballgame sets off a cascade of internal organ shutdowns.  Leave hospital three days later, eighteen pounds lighter.